What if Derek didnt die
by Meggie8ter
Summary: this is a alternate story of what would have happened if Derek didn't die, and how the couple deal with the idea of improving their relationship as a couple and coping with Meredith's big surprise she has for Derek.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1: Why was Derek Missing all day?

After the dreading call from Washington DC my heart was skipping a beat, everything that I could think of was going through my head of what happened to the love of my life. "Meredith are you ok" Bailey said. "Bailey I'm ok it just that Derek is missing" Meredith said. "Meredith he probably just got delayed in DC or here in Washington" Bailey said. I took Maranda's work for it as Derek could just be running late. After my talk with Bailey I tried think of something else, but all I could think of is Derek.

When I tried to call Derek I was pushed out of the way, as there was a mini plane crash in downtown Seattle. The thought of a plane crash brought back the memories of when Arizona, Christina, Derek, and I were in. Some of the things that I could remember from the plane crash was losing Lexie, and Mark. I can also remember searching for Derek out in the woods. The plane crash made me scared, but also brought fear to me because I was afraid I was going to lose the love of my life.

After a long surgery with Maggie, and Bailey I decided to pick up Zola, and Bailey from day-care and take them home. When I got home with the children I gave them dinner while I sat in front of the living room window waiting for Derek to come in the front door. After Zola and Bailey ate dinner I put them in their PJ's to get them ready for bed as it was late. When I put the children to bed I went back to the couch when the police arrived at my house. I opened the door and it was my loving husband standing there in his dark blue shirt with blood all over it. "Derek what happened" Meredith asked. "Meredith honey I was on my way to the airport, and I took a back road and saw a car crash, of course I got out and helped the victims" Derek explained. "But that doesn't explain why you haven't been answering my calls" Meredith said. "The reason why I haven't been answering my phone is because I have been at Dillard Medical Center helping out the other victims as the hospital has untrained doctors that don't know how diagnose brain injuries " Derek explained.

I was just happy that he was home, and that I didn't lose the love of my life like I had envisioned. Derek has been home for about an hour and was already sleeping in our queen size bed, I decided that I would get into my PJ's and go to bed. As soon as I got into bed Derek woke up. "Oh I'm sorry I woke you Derek" Meredith said. "You didn't Mer" Derek said. After I got into my bed with Derek we began to talk about our day when Zola woke up because of a nightmare. "Daddy your back" said the 5 year old little girl. "Yes Zola I'm back" Derek said. I asked Zola why she was up as it was extremely late for a little girl to be up. Before I knew it Zola was sleeping in the middle of the bed between both Derek and myself.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: My surprise for Derek

This morning I woke up and ran to the bathroom, as I almost vomited on Zola. I have been feeling sick for about a few days but I thought I was because Derek had been missing. After I got out of bathroom Derek was up with the kids, making them breakfast. "Meredith are you alright" Derek asked. "I'm okay I think it just nerves because you were missing" Meredith explained. Before I knew it I was back in the bathroom vomiting. After I was done vomiting Derek asked me if I was going to stay home because I was vomiting most of morning. I explained to Derek that I would be fine for work.

This Morning both Derek and Myself are going out to the back road to get Derek's car, as he was in the ambulance with one of the victims, because one had a severe head injury. The ride to Derek's car seemed long to me. I had Derek pull over on the side of the road so I could vomit again. Derek is concerned for me as he hasn't seen me vomit like this since I was an intern and had appendicitis. After my spell of vomiting Derek felt my forehead and I wasn't warm. Before I knew it we got to the car, and I drove Derek's car back to our house. As soon we got back to our house we had to leave again because we were going to be late for work. The 15 minute ride to the hospital felt long as I was feeling sick again.

When I got to the hospital I got into my scrubs, and started to proceed my day when Arizona came in. "Meredith, Derek has told me that you have been sick all morning" Arizona explained. "Yeah but I'm sure it's nothing" Meredith said. After my short talk with Arizona I made my way to the cafeteria to get some coffee. When I got to get coffee I got one smell of the coffee and I was severely sick again. The last time that I got sick by smelling coffee was when I was pregnant with Bailey.

After a long day at work I came home to Derek playing with the children, while Amelia was cooking dinner. When I got in the front door I went into the bathroom to take a pregnancy test. After a long 5 minutes the test came back positive. I was shocked to find out that I was pregnant as both Derek and I were just talking about how we wanted another baby a few days ago. After dinner I put Bailey into bed while Derek put Zola into her bed. Later that night I was talking to Derek when I explained that I'm pregnant. "Mer that's wonderful" Derek excitedly said. I told Derek that it was impossible to be pregnant so soon as we only discussed it.

When the next morning arrived I found myself in the bathroom again. The next thing I remember was going to the hospital and having Arizona check on both the baby and myself. Arizona told me I was 8 weeks along. She told me it was likely when Derek came home from DC that the baby was conceived. Before I knew it I was telling Derek about the baby and how far along I was. Derek was shocked because I was 8 weeks along. We began to think of what was going to happen with their future with a third baby on the way. I began to question myself thinking about what Bailey would think about having a brother or a sister younger than him. Bailey is my precious miracle baby, as I was told when I was an intern after I had a miscarriage I wouldn't be able to have a baby. Bailey seemed like he was no longer a miracle because of this baby growing inside of me.

 **To be continued**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: The Big Plan.

This morning I have my first ultrasound, Derek can't wait to hear the little heartbeat. I remember the first time I heard Bailey's little heartbeat, at first I thought I was going to lose him as I was told that I couldn't have any natural children. "Good afternoon Dr. Grey were ready for you and your husband" said an OBGYN. I wasn't ready for the appointment as I just found out about this baby. "Come on Meredith" Derek said. After I got settled onto the little table the ultrasound began.

"Well everything looks great their heartbeats are strong" said the OBGYN. "Their heartbeats" Meredith said. "Yes Dr. Grey you're having twins "said the doctor. Both Derek and I were shocked to find out we were having twins. "Meredith you know we should go on a family vacation with Zola, and Bailey before we have the twins" Derek explained. I thought it was a great idea because the last family vacation we had was when we went to New York to see Caroline when Zola was a baby. It has been about 4 years since we had our last family trip.

After the appointment we went back home to Amelia who had stayed home sick with the kids because she was vomiting and wasn't feeling well. "So Meredith how was your appointment" asked Amelia. "It was great we found out that we are having twins" Meredith said excitedly. "Twins wow that's exciting excuse me I'll be back "said a severely sick Amelia. After Amelia returned from the bathroom I explained to her that we wanted to take a family vacation. Amelia thought it was a great idea, and asked if she could come. Both Derek and I agreed that Amelia could come, as it could help both Derek and myself if we want some privacy.

The next thing I remember is Derek packing the children's clothing, a sickly Amelia packing her clothes. While I sat in the living room trying to call Christina and tell her the news about how I'm pregnant and expecting twins. Later that night at dinner Derek told both Amelia and myself that he bought some tickets to Disney World in Orlando Florida. I have never been to Florida so I'm looking forward to it. Amelia was excited to go as the last time she went was when both Derek, and Amelia's father was alive.

It was about 5:00 am and the alarm went off and I got Zola up while Derek got Bailey up. After I got Zola up Amelia who was feeling better made some coffee for herself and Derek. After everyone had their coffee we headed to the airport. The children were excited to go on their first trip to Disney. I was even looking forward to going because I never have never been. The trip to the airport felt like it was an hour long when it was actually 15 minutes from our house. I was kind of nervous for Bailey as he has never been on an airplane before. I sometimes have a hard time getting on a plane ever since the crash. I'm always afraid that the plane will go down and I'll be stuck out in the woods looking for Derek like I did for the crash.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: Our Family Vacation

Our plane landed at 8:00 pm in Orlando Florida, I'm not sure what the big fuss about Florida is, as it looks like LA to me. When the plane landed I quickly got off the plane with Zola to the bathroom. I forgot what it was like to be pregnant and how a baby strains a bladder but it's different this time as I'm having twins. After I came back from the bathroom with sleepy Zola, I found Derek, Bailey, and Amelia with the luggage, pointing to a limousine. "Derek what's with the limousine"asked Meredith. "Well I reserved us the family sweet that is on the magic kingdom grounds"Derek explained

I didn't know what to think about how the trip was going. "Momma I tied when we there" little 2 ½ year old little Bailey said tiredly. "Bailey it shouldn't be far now and then you can go to bed" Amelia told her nephew. I am glad that Amelia has a strong relationship between my children, as I think she wants to have a baby with Owen but I think she's scared. The next thing I remember was getting into our family sweet and I sat on the couch and turned on the news to see a tragedy in Seattle. I was thinking of all the surgeries that I could of done but I need a much needed rest. Derek was talking to Zola about what tomorrow is going to be like and I thought Zola was in bed as it was late for a 5 year old.

After Zola went to bed both Derek and I went to bed. When I woke up the next morning Bailey was already up and watching his favorite Disney TV show which is Mickey Mouse clubhouse, with Amelia, and Zola. I had know idea where Derek was, I was concerned because I was in a place I didn't know that well. "Meredith Derek went to Walgreens to get something for me as I'm still sick"explained Amelia. "Amelia I thought you were feeling better"asked Meredith. "Well I was but I woke up this morning vomiting again"Amelia explained. I was concerned for Amelia as, we were in a place that I didn't know what the hospital was like if was something seriously wrong.

Derek soon returned from the pharmacy with pregnancy tests for Amelia. I'm thought Derek would be mortified by getting his baby sister pregnancy tests. Before I knew it Amelia came out with a positive pregnancy test. "Meredith what am I going to do it's been 9 weeks since I've had intercourse with Owen" explained Amelia. I knew she was concerned about this baby because her first pregnancy she had a baby with no brain. I found it to be comforting for her as we both were going through the exact same thing.

Before I knew it we were on the monorail to the magic kingdom. Zola and Bailey were excited to go too Disney as see the castle. "Momma do you think we can see Anna and Elsa" said the excited 5 year old Zola. "Well Zola I don't know if we are going to as it's a big park here"said Derek. The next thing I remember is Bailey crying "Momma I got to go to the Circle room and make a doodle" said little Bailey. Bailey was easy to potty train compared to Zola. Both Derek and myself found it hard to teach Zola as we were busy with Derek's hand operations, the plane crash settlement, and me being pregnant with Bailey. I can't believe that Bailey is a very smart little boy I guess it's because of the Shepherd gene. Zola is pretty smart to but one of these days I'm prepared for Zola to ask why she is a different color than Derek, and myself.

After Bailey made his doodle we were walking around the park when Zola saw a little girl about her age with her father and then the father came up to Zola and asked where her parents were. As a parent I was frightened by this man I was also scared that he though that Zola was kidnapped from her parents. "Excuse me I couldn't help notice that the little girl is,different from you"said the father. "Well Zola is my daughter and it's none of your business to discriminate my family" said an angry Derek. "How is this child your she doesn't even look like you" said the father. I thought Derek was going to blow it but instead he took Zola and told me and Amelia that we were going back to our room. After that experience with Zola, Derek decided to find a stroller to put Zola in with Bailey to avoid people saying Zola doesn't belong to us.

Before I knew it our vacation was over and we had to go back home to the rainy Washington. I thought that our vacation was great except for that one father. Other than that one incident our family vacation was great. I can't wait to have these twins even though it about 6 months away, along with being an Aunt to Amelia's baby. When we finally got back home Amelia scheduled a appointment for prenatal care. I decided to go with her incase something was upsetting her, as Owen is in the Middle East for a tour as a medical advisor, and the baby will probably be born before he got back.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5: babies and sick children

Ok for Chapter 5 I skipped about three months which will explain what happens to Meredith, Derek, Zola, Bailey, and Amelia.

This morning I woke up to Derek making coffee, and Amelia making breakfast burritos. I knew that Amelia has been craving spicy foods for the past week. Today is both Amelia, and my 22 ultrasound to see how our babies are doing. Derek is excited to see our twins and find out what we are having, and to find out what Amelia is having. "Derek I'm scared about what the ultrasound tech will find with this baby" said a nerves' Amelia. "Amy I think this baby will be fine'' explained Derek. Before I knew it was time to go to the ultrasound.

"Dr. Grey and Dr. Shepherd" said the ultrasound technician. The technician told Amelia and myself that we could chose who goes first. Amelia wanted to go first. Everything that Amelia was worried about had come to a pause when the technician said that the baby's brain was developed like a normal baby. The technician also told Amelia that she was expecting a daughter. I was excited to have a niece that would be close in age with the twins. The next thing I remember is Derek getting called to the day-care because Bailey started running a fever, and vomiting. "Meredith Bailey is sick and I need to go get him" explained Derek. "Okay I'll wait for you to come with sick Bailey'' explained Meredith.

A few minutes later Derek returned with Bailey, and Zola. I asked Derek why he took Zola out until he explained that Zola was complaining about a sore throat and has a slight ever. The next thing I remember is the technician saying that the twins are girls. Both Derek and I were excited to find out that we were expecting twins. After the ultrasound I took the children home while Derek and Amelia went to work. When I got home I put Bailey and Zola to bed so they could rest and maybe feel better. After I put the kids to bed I went into the empty bedroom that had Bailey's old crib in it. I was thinking of what we should decorate the girl's room, and thinking wither or not Amelia would want to put her child with our girls. I couldn't believe that we were going to have twin daughters I thought of some names that might be suitable for the twins.

When Derek came home he wanted to talk about names for the girls. One of the names that Derek liked was Lexie Caroline Grey Shepherd, as it is the name of both my half-sister who died in the plane crash and Caroline after his mother. One of the names I liked was Ellis Marie Grey Shepherd, I thought Ellis was a pretty name that and she could be named after her grandmother. Derek loved the names so we decided on naming the girls Lexie and Ellis. We were excited for Lexie and Ellis' arrival even though it is almost 3 months away. Before I knew it we ended up going to the emergency room with Zola who was screaming because she was in pain. I had Bailey in my arms who was still sick with a fever he hadn't vomited in a few hours but he was complaining about his ear. Derek wanted Bailey to get checked out to make sure he was okay.

Amelia came in and asked what was wrong with her niece and nephew. The next thing I remember is having Bailey diagnosed with an ear infection. While we found out that Zola had strep throat. I felt hopeless for my children as I couldn't do anything because they were sick.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6: Hospital Gala's and Bailey's birthday

 **Now because in season 10 when Bailey was a new-born baby and the hospital did a party well I decided to do a Hospital Gala in honor of Derek's research back in D.C. I also wanted Christina for the gala and Bailey's 3** **rd** **birthday.**

Tonight is the Hospital gala and I have nothing to wear, and have to go shopping for a dress. I'm going dress shopping with Amelia, Zola, and Christina. I'm extremely happy to have Christina around as I haven't seen her in about a year since she moved to Switzerland with Ross. She was surprised to see me pregnant, because she knew the complications I had when I gave birth to Bailey. "Meredith are you ready to head to the mall to go dress shopping" said a peppy Amelia. "Amy com down it's the mall there's nothing exciting about the mall" explained Meredith. "Momma what store will have a cute dress for me to wear tonight" asked Zola. The hospital invited Zola, and Bailey to the gala considering the hospital is honoring their father.

It was about 12:00 when we left for the mall. The first place we stopped at the mall was Fancy which is a store full of dress shoes. The first part of the store we went to was the children's section. Zola picked out a pair of beautiful purple little girl shoes. When I picked out my shoes they were black flat shoes. Amelia also picked out flat shoes, along with Christina. We went into a dress store I couldn't remember the name of the store. I fell in love with a silver and glittery dress but being 5 ½ months pregnant with twins it's kind of hard to find a dress that will fit. The dress that I found was black with diamonds on it, and it hid my extending baby bump which was what I really enjoyed.

After we got all the necessary outfits that we needed, I went into a pet store while Amelia, Zola, and Christina went to the food court. I found this adorable puppy that I thought Bailey would like for his 3rd birthday. When Zola turned 3 we really didn't celebrate it because it was a few days after the plane crash and we were in the hospital that we were supposed to land safely to., but it didn't turn out that way. Somehow Derek, and I will make it up to her when she turns 6. When we got back from the mall, I came in the front door to see Bailey dressed in his little tux that Derek had got for him in Dc.

It has been a roller coaster between us in our marriage for about a year and a half, due to Derek's job in Dc. When he went to quite is when I thought I lost him and that we would never end up that way we had imagined ourselves, when Derek's and I got married on the post it note 8 years ago. Wow I can't believe that it has been 8 years since we wrote our post it note marriage but in retrospect it's only been 5 years that we have been legally married. Before I knew it, it was time to go to the hospital gala. I can't believe that I actually found a dress that hides my baby bump. I loved every inch of the dress. The hospital was decorated with balloons, pictures of Derek, Myself, Zola, Bailey, and Amelia. I was shocked to find out that the Gala was also a way for our co-workers to say thank you for everything that we have done for them.

During the gala we had dancing. I watched Zola dance with Sofia, and Tuck while Bailey danced with Dr. Bailey. Miranda really likes Bailey as he is named after her because she saved my life after I gave birth to him. It was my way of honoring her and thanking her. After the Gala the children, Amy, and myself were tired and wanted to go to bed. All I can remember is Derek putting the children to bed while I got in my PJs. Derek came in the room after getting the children to bed and asked me if I would be willing to work on a case with him. I explained to Derek that I was interested and wanted to do more projects with him. Derek was happy to have me help him on a project.

It had been two days since the Gala and I have to go to the mall and pick up Bailey's birthday present at 3:00. I can't believe that it is his 3rd birthday today. I started to cry thinking about bailey being 3 I knew it must have been the pregnancy hormones that were causing me to feel the way I feel. As the day went on both Derek, and myself were preparing for the party. After we got out of work both of us headed to the mall without Bailey, and Zola. Amelia was watching the children. After we got Bailey's birthday present we went home. Bailey was happy to have his sister, friend, aunts, and his parent's friends everyone had a great time at the party. After Bailey's party he fell asleep with his puppy that he named Marley. I thought it was clever for Bailey to name his yellow lab after the dog in his favorite book, and movie.

After Derek and I put the children to bed we talked for a little bit. Even though I'm exhausted being pregnant with these twins I'm looking forward to the day that I can hold them. Derek can't wait to hold both of the girls we aren't sure which one is going to be Lexie and which one is going to Ellis yet but we are excited for them. It was about 2:30 when I woke Derek up out of a dead sleep for him to get me some watermelon. Derek wasn't use to these night cravings as I didn't have them with Bailey. Around the time Derek went to go get some watermelon Zola woke up. "Zola what are you doing up at 2:30 in the morning" asked Meredith. "Momma I had a nightmare and can't go back to sleep" said the tired little girl. Zola had crawled into the bed with me. When Derek returned he found Zola, and myself asleep. I believe he went to sleep out on the couch that night I'm not sure where he was.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7: Christmas Babies

 **Okay I jumped 2 months because I really want to introduce Lexie, Ellis, and Amelia's daughter.**

It was Christmas Eve morning, both Amelia and I aren't in good moods. Amelia is 38 weeks pregnant along with me and we just want these babies to come. Today is my last day of work until the twins are 3 months old. Derek has been understanding by taking Marley, Zola, and Bailey for a walk while I rest. Tonight is one of those nights that you hope you don't go into labor as children need their parents on Christmas. It was about 2:30 I started to get back pain but I didn't think I was in labor I still had a surgery to do. The surgery that I'm doing is with Amelia while Derek takes the children to go see the Christmas lights.

During the surgery my back pains became more frequent while Amelia was starting to get stomach cramps. After Amelia did the last stich her water broke. "Um Meredith this little girl is coming now can you call Derek" said Amelia. I was panicking when I called Derek I told him that his niece was on her way. After I called Derek I felt another strong pain in my back and the next thing I remember was having Dr. Bailey pushing me in a wheel chair to a dual room so I could be with Amelia. When Derek finally arrived with the children I was in active labor along with Amelia. "Meredith I thought It was just Amy" asked Derek. "Derek honey I've had back pains for the past 6 hours and after I called you I guess that's when these little girls were going to decide to come'' explained Meredith. I felt bad for Zola and Bailey as they had to go into day-care on Christmas Eve ad they don't even get to watch for Santa like they would normally.

It was about 10:00 when Amelia started to push. I was only 8 cm so I wasn't ready to push. Amelia started to push until Callie came in with Owen who came home earlier than expected. He was shocked to find out that he was going to be a father and that she didn't even tell him she was pregnant. Amelia was happy to have him home, it was another 3 minutes and I could hear my niece crying like a little angel. Amelia named her little girl Olivia Ann Shepherd Hunt. Olivia had red hair just like her father but had her mother's eyes. It was about 45 minutes later that I actually started to push. Derek was there for every moment. The next thing I remember is hearing one of my little angels crying. We decided to choose who is who after they are both born. After the first baby was born it was just 3 short minutes before the second one came.

Both Derek and I got a Christmas surprise when we were told that the girls were identical twins. The First baby that was born we decided on naming Lexie, and the second one Ellis. This was a Christmas Eve nobody could forget as I got what I wanted for Christmas which was to finally met Olivia, Lexie, and Ellis. It was 8:30 am when Zola, and Bailey got to meet their cousin and their sisters. Bailey was happy to see the babies but asked where his toys from Santa were. Derek explained to Bailey that Santa's toys were at the house and that Derek would bring them to the hospital when he takes Marley out. I was extremely tired when Derek brought Zola and Bailey back up to day-care.

 **Olivia Ann Shepherd Hunt**

 **December 24, 2015**

 **7 pounds**

 **19 Inches long**

 **Lexie Caroline Grey Shepherd-**

 **December 24, 2015**

 **6 pounds 8 ounces**

 **19 inches long**

 **Ellis Marie Grey Shepherd-**

 **December 24, 2015**

 **6 pounds 6 ounces**

 **19 inches long**


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8: the first night!

It has only been 3 days since I gave birth to Lexie and Ellis and I'm looking forward to going home today with the girls to celebrate a late Christmas with my older children as, Derek and I decided to wait to celebrate Christmas until Lexie, Ellis, Amelia, Olivia and I can finally go home. I'm excited to go home to my own bed, my noise children instead of machines, and not having a whole bunch of people coming in to see me when I'm trying to sleep. I also missed hearing the nature sounds that I usually hear from my house.

It was about 12:30 by the time Derek came with the kids, I was excited to see Zola, and Bailey. "Momma can little sissies come home with me" asked a happy Bailey. "Yes sweetie Lexie and Ellis get to come home today with us" explained Meredith. "Meredith I'm ready to go home and I really appreciate that both Derek and you are allowing Owen, Olivia, and myself live at the house with you guys" explained Amelia. Before I knew it Derek came back from the nursery with Lexie who was dressed in a pink dress that Derek picked out and Ellis who was in a purple dress that I picked out. When I saw my girls I began to cry. I couldn't believe that I was a mother of 4 kids.

I was tired when I got home, Derek thought I should take a nap while he watched the children. At first I was afraid to leave Derek alone with Zola, Bailey, Lexie, and Ellis while I took a nap. I can remember the first time I let Derek watch Bailey and I woke up to Zola crying for Derek's help because she was in the bathroom and needed help cleaning up. Derek had fallen asleep with Bailey in his arms. After my nap I felt refreshed even though I'll be up most of the night with Lexie, and Ellis. Derek is prepared for it as Bailey would wake up every hour because he was either wet, hungry, or didn't like to sleep. "Meredith do you think the girls will be like Bailey" asked Derek. "Well Derek every child is different so I don't know what they will be like" explained Meredith.

It was about 3:00 when Zola, and Bailey came into my room jumping on the bed. Derek came into the room with who I thought was Lexie crying because she was hungry. "Zola and Bailey please don't jump on the bed remember mommy just had Lexie and Ellis" Derek explained. "Ok dada will you help me in the circle room after I take a doodle" asked Bailey.

After I fed who ended up being Ellis, Lexie started to cry because she was hungry. I found it hard to tell which baby was Lexie or Ellis. Derek decided he would put Lexie in pink and Ellis in purple. It's going to be difficult when the girls are older to tell them apart. When I was done feeding Lexie, we decided to celebrate Christmas.

Later that night when Zola, Bailey, Lexie, and Ellis were asleep Derek thought it would be nice to watch a movie together until Marley started to bark and woke up Lexie and Ellis. Derek took Marley for a walk while I was able to get Lexie to fall back asleep, but I wasn't able to get Ellis to go back to sleep. I was afraid she was going to wake up Zola and Bailey.

After Derek was able to get Ellis to fall back asleep I was too tired to watch a movie with Derek. The twins woke up at 3:00 am wanting to be fed and changed, after Derek and I finally got them back to sleep we slept for about 30 minutes until Bailey comes in our room saying he has a stomach ache and is itchy all over. I turned on the lamp to see a rash on Bailey I woke up Derek to look at it. Derek thought it was just chicken pox until Bailey vomited a dark color on my favorite pj's.

I knew that Bailey had something serious and needed to go to the ER. I quickly got dressed, woke up Zola and got her dressed, while Derek put Lexie and Ellis in their car seats. The ride to the hospital was nerve wreaking for me because my son was sick and I didn't know what he had. On the way to the hospital I called Alex and told us to meet him there. When we got their Alex took Bailey to get examined as a doctor I thought I could help but because I'm on maternity leave, and I'm the patients mother I was just another concerned parent. It was 15 minutes later when Alex told Derek and myself that Bailey has a 75% chance of Scarlet fever, and that Bailey was being admitted to the hospital. I was scared to death because it is rare to get scarlet fever in 2015.

I then to begin to worry about Zola, Lexie, and Ellis. Alex checked Zola who was perfectly fine, then he checked the twins and said that they were fine. I asked Alex if I could go and see my son while Derek watched the girls. I asked Derek if he could drop Zola and the twins over at Owen's trailer so both Derek and I could be with Bailey as he needs his parents. I stayed with Bailey while Derek brought the girls to Owen, and Amelia. While Derek was gone I think I might have dosed off in the chair next to Bailey when Dr. Bailey came by and asked why I was at the hospital when I should be with my babies, until she saw Bailey in the hospital bed. Bailey came in to look at Bailey and said that the last time she saw scarlet fever was when she was in med school and it was scary for the parents of the child.

 **A/N: Scarlet fever may not be as common as it was in the 1800s but you can still get it. back in 2012 I got it and I was scared. I have plans for little Bailey and how Meredith and Derek cope with it along with having Zola, and the twins to worry about.**


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9: Bailey's Diagnoses

Early this morning Bailey was admitted to the hospital for what Alex thought was a 75% chance of scarlet fever. I stayed with Bailey while Derek took care of the girls. It's hard to take care of a sick child while having new-born babies to care for. When Bailey was born we had help from Callie as she was living with us for a while because of all the issues Callie had with Arizona cheating on her with another woman. When I found out I was pregnant with Lexie and Ellis both Derek and I thought Amelia would help like Callie did until she found out she was pregnant with Olivia.

Now that it's just Derek and I taking care of 4 children we are starting to find it difficult to care for them and go to work. "Momma were ZoZo" asked sick Bailey. "Bailey ZoZo is with Uncle Owen, your baby sisters and Daddy" explained Meredith. Before I knew it Alex came in with Bailey's throat culture. Alex had been waiting for the results for about 3 hours. "Okay Meredith, Bailey's throat culture came back negative for scarlet fever but I would like to do some more testing on him" explained Alex. "Okay Alex do what you must all I care about right now is Bailey feeling better'' explained Meredith. I knew that some tests come back as a false negative but why would they do it to my little boy.

After my talk with Alex I went through all of the things that could happen to Bailey. I was concerned for Bailey and I was praying that Bailey was going to be okay. I normally don't pray but when something tragic happens to me that's when I pray. The last time I prayed was about 7 months ago when Derek had gone missing. I looked at Bailey and he gave me his sad eyes he does when he's either sad, scared, or sick. After I looked at Bailey I gave Derek a call and asked him to get Bailey something special to make him feel better at the hospital.

While Derek was getting something for Bailey I overheard a nurse talking about a 3 year old little boy that has a possibility of scarlet fever but the labs came back negative. I quickly paged Alex to find out what was going on with Bailey. When Alex showed up, he had a panic look on his face. I quickly asked Alex what was wrong. "Bailey's new results are positive for scarlet fever, and I'm going to give him some medication but I would like him to stay at the hospital for a week before I can allow Derek and yourself take home Bailey, as it is a safety measure for your other children" explained Alex.

It has been a week since Bailey was admitted to the hospital, both Derek and I did shifts to be with Bailey and our other children. Today Bailey is coming home and I'm actually relived that Bailey is coming home to be with the family. It has been a long week in the hospital with Bailey, as I had visons of Bailey dying and both Derek and I have to say goodbye to our son at a young age, a parent should never lose a child before you but it happens, to a lot of people. Jackson and April are great examples of that as it has been a hard year for them as their son Samuel died with broken bone syndrome, and they decided to induce him and he was born 3 months early and died hours after his birth.

 **A/N: This scene in chapter 9 is actually a chapter in my novel that I'm hand writing and I have no intentions of copying somebody elses work. I really enjoyed writing all of Meredith's mixed feelings about Bailey. Stay tune for Chapter 10 it is going a great story.**


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10: The Seattle Tornado

Today is my first day back to work since I gave birth to Lexie and Ellis, and I'm looking forward to working on a case with Derek as I did when I was an intern. This morning it's gloomy out, but name a day that Washington isn't gloomy. When I dropped the 4 kids off at Day-care I heard the news report saying that Seattle Washington was under a Tornado warning. It is rare to actually be in a Tornado warning. The last time there was a tornado warning in the state of Washington we actually had one touch down near the border of Oregon. When I was a child growing up in Boston I only knew of places like Kansas getting tornados as it is in the center of dead nothing.

It was about 12:30 when Derek, Callie, Amelia got the children for lunch. During our lunch there was an alarm in the hospital that I have never heard before it was scary and I wasn't sure what it was about until I heard Jackson to get under the table with the children. Going under the table made the situation even scarier because I didn't know what was going on. The last time I was under a table was when Gary Clark came in with the gun and shot Derek. Memories like this I try to block out by looking at my amazing children, and think of all the struggles both Derek and I had to face. Before long the alarm stopped everyone began to get up to see that the alarm was a Tornado alarm. As we had a tornado and it was the scariest things that has ever happened to me next to drowning, the plane crash, and giving birth to Bailey.

The next thing I remember is Derek taking the children back up to the day-care, and I getting paged to the ER. The hospital was getting multiple calls for help with a lot of injured people. Owen sprang into action as he was in the military. Overseas they have emergencies like this but never a tornado. I began to think that my life is just full of mysteries as I never know what I going to happen to me. When the first ambulance showed up it was a young child about Zola's age on the gurney and need a head CT scan as the rescue workers found a lot of debris of the child. Both Derek, and I went to work on the child as Amelia went home with Olivia. The end of the day was going to be a long time away because of all the multiple patients, injuries.

It was about 12:30 pm by the time the day ended. Both Derek and I were exhausted, and were heading home when the rescue workers found 2 more patients. One was a little girl that looked like Alex, and the women looked like Izzy my former co-worker. "Meredith save Emily let her father care for her" asked Jane Doe who was in fact Izzy." "Izzy we will save you and Emily don't worry about a thing" said Derek. Derek had already operated on Izzy more than once so he knows what her medical history was. I asked Izzy who Emily's father was. She explained that Alex is her father. Nobody not even Alex knew she was pregnant when she left. Alex was shocked to find out he was a father to a 6 year old little girl.

After we operated on Izzy and Emily, Derek and I decided to stay in the on call room as it was now 3:00 am and by the time we get home it will be time to come back to work and do it all over the next day. After Izzy woke up from surgery I went to check on her and she had just moved back to Seattle 2 days ago transferring from Dartmouth medical center in New Hampshire. I was shocked that she came back here, and had a daughter that Alex didn't know about. Alex saw Izzy and started to talk to her like she never left in the first place. Jo got pissed off at Alex because he decided to stay with his ex-wife and his daughter , than go home to the Pratt house that Alex, Izzy, Christiana, George, Meredith, Callie and a few others once stayed.

 **A/N: I know that there is a story of Izzy coming back, I actually didn't have an intention of bringing her back, until I watched the last scene of season 5 and how much Alex really loved Izzy I'm hoping to have them together again. Also I'm kind of making Izzy's storyline similar to Ellis Grey but they will have different storylines. Stay tune for Chapter 11 its going to be great.**


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11: Derek's emergency

This morning as I was preparing for work and Derek woke up sicker than a dog. "Derek I don't think you should go to work today"explained Meredith. "I'll be fine but is the room is spinning fast what's going on" said Derek. Before I knew it Derek fell on to the floor. I tried to get him to respond to me but I got nothing as I went to call 911 I heard Zola talking to someone. "Zo who are you talking to" asked Meredith. "Mommy its 911 daddy needs help" explained the smart little girl. I quickly got Bailey, Lexie, and Ellis up and dressed so I could go to the hospital. The ambulance showed up and quickly took Derek into the ambulance.

The Hospital ride to the hospital was scary until Bailey begin to make a conversation. " Momma why baby sissy's sit different from me and Zo" asked Bailey. "Well Bails you and Zola are big kids and have a a big kid seat" explained a nervous Meredith. Bailey normally sat next to Zola but when Derek bought a new car the children got switched and Bailey now sits with Ellis instead of Zola and Zola next to Lexie instead of Bailey. Some of the things that Bailey say can be funny and relaxing especially in a emergency situation. By the time I got to the hospital Alex was waiting for Me as Zola called him in the car. He was going to take the children to daycare while I stayed with Derek.

After Alex took the kids I went to Derek's bedside where Amelia examined him for possible brain injuries. "Meredith, I need to take Derek for a CT I'm afraid he might have an aneurism that is causing the fainting" explained Amelia. I agreed with her hoping to find answers to what was wrong with Derek. A nurse came by during Derek's CT asking me what happened in the past 12 hours. I told the nurse everything I knew. I even told her that Derek woke up at 5:00 puking but he said he was fine and that it was just a bug going around. The nurse quickly walked away I didn't know where she was going. I was afraid of losing him especially after we have 2 babies that are only 4 months old who need their father.

Amelia came back and said that Derek's head has a slight aneurysm but she is more concerned about the nurse telling her about the vomiting. The next thing I remember is having Dr. Bailey paged into room 409. She examined Derek and wanted a blood test. After the blood test she checked his right side where his appendix is. Dr. Bailey told me that he needed to have an ultrasound to check on his appendix. After the testing I was told that he was going to be preped for an emergency surgery. I couldn't be in with him, instead I was a patients spouse. I was pacing just to find out what was going on.

Dr. Bailey came out and said that his surgery was life threatening and that his appendix almost bursted. She explained how he should wake up soon, and that he is being monitored in case he has to have the brain operation. I was scared but I knew he was in great hands. I ended up taking a week off work in case Derek's condition gets worse

A/N: sorry for the delay I'm hoping I'm not copying anyone else's fan fiction because I came up with this idea upon watching mystery diagnosis stay tuned for chapter 12 as it explains Derek's condition and the start of an old romance between Alex and Izzy.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12: The Medical Mystery of Derek Christopher Shepherd

It has only been 2 hours since Derek had his operation and he still has a fever and is still vomiting, Dr. Bailey says it's natural after having an appendicitis but I don't remember having this problem when I had appendicitis when I was an intern. Fighting for a person that you love is the hardest thing to do, I myself never thought it would happen to me. Sitting next to a sickly Derek makes me feel sad and helpless like I did 4 months ago when Bailey had scarlet fever. Derek has always been here for me and now I'm here for him. After 4 hours after Derek's surgery I paged Dr. Bailey again as his condition has gotten worse with time.

I thought of what I would be like if I was a single mother, and the thought was awful as we have been through so much and that Derek was going to make it. To get my mind off of Derek I went to the day-care to see my beautiful children, as I was with the children I heard a page for Maggie Peirce saying a patient was coding in room 409. After I heard the page I ran to the room seeing Derek lying flat down like most coding patients. I began to have a panic attack and I don't remember what happen when I had the panic attack, the next thing I remember is landing in a hospital room right next to Derek's. Maggie came in and told me that she is taking Derek for a CT for his heart. "Maggie what do you think it is and can you help him'' asked Meredith. "Meredith I think it is a cardo blockage which is the reason for the fainting but the fever and vomiting is a whole different diagnoses that Dr. Bailey has fixed" explained Maggie.

I trusted Maggie as she is my half-sister from my mother and we get along great with each other. While Derek was in the CT Callie walked by and asked how I was doing. I wasn't sure what had happened and why I was on an IV or even in a hospital bed. I was also hooked up to monitors that were directly to my heart. I began to think that maybe Derek has a viral infection in his heart as most of his symptoms are related to a heart infection. I then realized that when I have a panic attack my heart is going a mile a minute and that it needs to be monitored when I have one. The last time I had a panic attack was when there was a shooting in the hospital but I guess it wasn't as bad as the one that landed me into this room next to Derek.

After Derek's CT Maggie explained that he indeed did have a viral infection in his heart. She also told me that he would need to me monitored in the hospital until it gets better. I was relieved that somebody actually found out what was going on. During the conversation with Maggie Derek woke up asking for me. I was able to go to the next room to see him. "Meredith what's going on and why does my side hurt" asked Derek. "Derek you had appendicitis and Dr. Bailey had to operate, she said your side would feel better with time, you also have a heart infection that Maggie is watching" explained Meredith. After I explained to Derek about his condition I got a call from the Day-care to find out that Derek Bailey Shepherd got into a fight with another child over play-doh, and I had to pick him up. This reminded me of the time Dr. Bailey's son Tuck got in a fight over a cookie when he was a baby. I don't know what has gotten into Bailey lately because between Derek and myself we get 5 calls a week, with him either fighting with the other children or him not listening to the director. Derek seems to think its because he's not getting enough time with either one of us due to the Lexie, and Ellis taken up most of our time. We didn't have this problem with Zola when Bailey was born so I don't know why we are having it with Bailey.

It was a week later and Derek was well enough to go home. I was happy to have Derek home because I had to call Alex multiple times to help me with Bailey as he was refusing to do anything I told him, or even just to get him to eat. Derek told me when he was in the hospital that he was going to try to spend a little more time with Bailey. I told Derek that Bailey was showing signs of Autism. Derek agreed that Bailey was showing signs of Autism, and needs to be tested. Both Derek and Myself decided that we would get Bailey checked out but in order to get Bailey tested we would have to travel to a Neurosurgeon that is not close to the situation which would mean we would have to go across country to get the diagnoses.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13: Bailey's diagnoses

It was about a week since Derek and I decided to have Bailey tested for Autism. We are going to travel to Indiana to have Bailey tested by a children's neurologist. Derek and I are scared to actually find out what Bailey has and what it may affect with our future. While Derek, Bailey, and I are away the girls will be with Maggie. As a mother of 4 it's going to be hard to be away from my other children while I find out what is wrong with my only son.

The trip to Indiana was nerve wrecking as I thought of all the things that could happen to Bailey if he in fact has Autism. Tomorrow we are going to Indiana children's hospital for the neurologist to do testing on Bailey. As the night came I asked Derek if we are doing the right thing what if Bailey is just a normal 3 year old little boy. Derek informed me that it's better to be on the safe side. During the night I had an awful nightmare about Bailey's future. When I woke up the next morning to go over to the hospital I called Maggie to find out how Zola, Lexie, and Ellis were, and she said that the girls are fine.  
When we got to the hospital to Bailey's appointment the nurse said that Bailey looked healthy for an active three year old. As the neurologist came in he asked some questions about Bailey's actions and how he has been acting. Both Derek and I told the doctor all the things that Bailey has been doing. The doctor decided to do a couple of tests that might help us with Bailey. During the tests the doctor was explaining to us what she suspects Bailey has. When Dr. Clever finished up the testing with Bailey she gave us a diagnoses. "Mr, and Mrs Shepherd I have the diagnoses of Bailey disorder" said Dr. Clever. "Will we need help with Bailey when he gets older" Derek and Meredith. "Mr, and Mrs Shepherd Bailey does not have autism, or any disorder that affects his brain as he is a normal boy who full of energy" explained Dr. Clever.

We were relived to find out **B** ailey was going to be a normal boy. The trip home was exciting as we were going home to the girls, and Derek can introduce Bailey to soccer to release some of the energy. When we got home Derek and Bailey went outside and played soccer for a couple of hours until dinner was ready. Later that night when we went to put Bailey to bed he fell fast asleep. Derek and I fell asleep with the thought of Bailey as a professional soccer player of a baseball player.

 **A/N: I decided against Autism because I had a plan for Bailey to be a hyper boy that gets into trouble because he has a lot of energy that needs to be run out of him. But in a future story Bailey is going to be a smart but energetic little league player that has a dream of being a General Surgeon like his mother**


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14: Saying Goodbye is the hardest thing to do.

Bailey has been quite fond of his dog Marley, but Marley is dying from a brain tumour and it's hard to tell a little boy why his puppy is dying. This morning Derek is taking Marley to the vet to put him down. "Derek maybe we should wait a few years before the children can get a new pet" suggested Meredith. We were planning on getting another pet but I thought I would be tough on the children if we got another pet. "Meredith you are probably right maybe when the girls are old enough to play with a dog, or cat" explained Derek. Bailey was upset learning that Marley was going to be with family members that have died.

It is hard on a child to have a pet for a few months and have to put the pet down. "Mommy I'm going to Miss Marley but I'm sure Aunty Lexie will take care of him" explained Zola. Zola loved her aunt Lexie and was happy to have a little sister named after her aunt. I didn't know what to say to my daughter. It was 10:30 when Derek left with Marley. Bailey was crying when Derek left with Marley because bailey knew he would never see Marley again.

While Derek took Marley to the vet to get put down I tried to get Marley off of Bailey's mind but it is hard for a three year because Marley was his best friend. I felt bad for Bailey as he had no friends. Bailey reminds me of myself when I was little because I didn't have any friends until I moved back to Seattle. Every look that Bailey made he looked just like me, he even has my hair. With the Twins we don't know who they are going to look after. "Mommy everything going to be okay isn't" asked Zola. "Yeah Zola everything is going to be okay" Meredith explained. "Mommy I'm going to miss taking Marley for a walk with the twins, dada, Zozo, and you to help him create a doodle" explained Bailey.

 **A/N: This is the final chapter of what if Derek didn't die/. I have started a sequel of this story named 5 years later. I have alto of Meredith and Derek adventures as parents. I hope everyone enjoyed this story.**


	15. Chapter 15

Good news I decided to start writing more ideas for what Derek didn't die it came to me the other day and I think it will help my writers block for the other two stories that come after what If Derek didn't die stay turn for an update it should be within the next 5 maybe 6 weeks as I'm in school and the semester is almost over and I can't wait to start writing again.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 15: Meredith's surprise she wasn't expecting.

I may be one of those mothers who are self-centered when they are talking to other mothers about my children. Being a mother of a younger son, identical twins, and my lovely Zola it's hard to imagine life without them. But lately I have been tired and worn down and have a hard time keeping down any food but hey I guess it's just the stomach bug. I hope it's not anything horrible that I will die from because I am just getting into this new life that I love and my children need me.

When I was walking the 4 children I started to vomit and Derek came and asked if I was okay because he was worried about me because the last time I was like this was 18 months ago before we found out about Lexie and Ellis. I can't be pregnant again as Lexie and Ellis are only 9 months old and they need me. If I am pregnant Derek and I are going to have to clean out one of the rooms that is full of storage items. I really hope that the next child I have is another boy because Bailey needs a little brother to play with.

This morning when I went to go to work I vomited again so I decided that it was time to go see Arizona to find out what is going on. Derek thinks that I have the flu that April can't get rid of even though Jackson and April are fighting I think they are having a baby. When I got to work I saw Arizona with Derek and we found out that I was indeed pregnant again but I also found out that I'm further along than I thought because I thought I was around 8 weeks but I am actually 14 weeks which would mean this baby will be born sooner than both Derek and I expected. We love the idea of having another baby but we aren't sure if we want to have another baby after this one because we already have 4 kids and with this one we will have 5.

When Derek and I returned home for the night we decided that it was time we told Zola and Bailey about the new baby because they were excited when we told them about Lexie and Ellis. I started to cook dinner when Zola came home with Amelia, and baby Olivia when Amelia asked me how she could surprise Owen with something for their daughter's birthday that is coming up shortly. "Well Amelia we have a surprise for the family for Lexie and Ellis's birthday but if you would like we can tell you now." I told her. "Meredith it's only in a few weeks I can wait unless you are excited." She told me. "Well Amelia we are expecting another child and we are excited about the new baby on the way." I told Amelia.

Amelia was shocked that we were expecting another child because she thought we were down after the birth of the twins because of the scare that we had with our son Bailey. I actually didn't mind the idea of another child because I grew up alone and had no siblings to rely on. I know that I have siblings now but I never grew up with them and I would give any day to have grown up with them because I love them even if Lexie is dead and Maggie is the only sister that actually talks to me.

 ** _A/N: so I decided that 5 years later wasn't fitting into this story and neither was growing up shepherds so I decided I would recreate those stories but make them follow this storyline. Sorry the chapter is so short but I hope to have more to this story with in the next few days, and for those that liked the old version's I am going to make it better than the originals which I hope to have 5 years later chapter 1 done by tonight._**


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